YA THINK?
“Corporate bullshit is a specific style of communication that uses confusing, abstract buzzwords in a functionally misleading way,” said Littrell, a postdoctoral researcher in the College of Arts and Sciences. “Unlike technical jargon, which can sometimes make office communication a little easier, corporate bullshit confuses rather than clarifies. It may sound impressive, but it is semantically empty.”
My nemesis at my previous job was a major bullshitter and everyone knew it, except some management. Woe be to those who actually listened to him - it never ended well for them. Other managers knew better, or at least were warned.
Nice guy, but a complete moron professionally.
I recall one time he was telling a group of us about a test he and management wanted to do. “No changes to the software,” he said, repeatedly. Looking around the room, I knew no one believed him (well, he believed it, I’m sure, but no one else), but we all knew it was pointless to point out that he would be proven wrong. And he was, of course. (He wasn’t a liar, just an idiot.)
This dude would do everything he could to make me look bad, sometimes in front of external groups, other times in front of management. I never complained, but others complained to his supervisor on my behalf, and he’d apologize, then do it again a few months later. Again, it wasn’t malice, he’s just an idiot and doesn’t think.
One time I got him. He asked if we had planned for a workload that was higher than some people expected, and I was able to say, “Actually we budgeted for even more than this.” A woman that worked for me, when she saw I was having a bad day, would ask, “Hey remember when you showed up Bob in that meeting in front of management?” It always improved my mood. Some coworkers are gold.
One time, he was set to become my supervisor, and I was like, yeah, I’m gone if that happens. Fortunately, it didn’t.
I had a guy like this at a previous job. Same story with everything. The guy was a self-proclaimed master of weird languages that no one ever used.
He actually managed to become my supervisor. I immediately went to the big boss and told him I would quit if it happened. The boss confirmed that he would become my supervisor and it was a final decision.
I quit. What’s weird is that I was the only macOS/iPhone developer at the time in a mostly Windows company. They struggled for a few months after I left, and they closed the company.
That guy is now a manager at a fast food. I pity the employees who work with him.