Hey. Just a question. Say there’s a woman and she goes on a theoretical date. She gets tipsy sfter being plied with drinks and allows herself to be convinced to go back to a guy’s apartment. He insists “just to hang out” during that time he coerces her into some kind of act. Could be sex entirely or maybe sex without protection… When she sobers up she starts freaking the fuck out because under sober circumstances she would never of said yes to that.

You tell this story to a bunch of people and what’s the generalized perception of what went wrong? She should never have gone back to his apartment. She should have known better. She participated in a risky behavior and while everyone probably agrees the guy in the situation is absolute scum it remains - this outcome was horrible but culturally predictable.

Also your assessment of whether that three percent is an even split is forgetting a lot of other data. Across the board your chance of encountering any kind of violence is 4-8x more likely to be perpetrated by a man rather than a woman. 1 in 5 women have experienced rape and that number jumps up to 1 in 3 when you broaden the term to sexual assault. About 90% of those reported sexual assaults are perpetrated by men. That means if you are a woman between 20% to 60% of all the other women you know statistically speaking have been sexually predated on by a man at some point and that’s just the ones we know are reported because a lot of people cope with sexual assault by never speaking of it to anyone.

That’s no lightning strike. That poster lowballed you significantly on those statistics .

Women are taught to interact with men the same way you are instructed to interact with city traffic and they aren’t nessisarily wrong to do so. Remember, that 1 in 5 or 1 in 3 is still happening in a world where women are instructed to minimize risk by altering their behaviour. This is under circumstances where women are educated of those dangers and treat men as risks which means they have mitigated some of the attempts. Don’t leave your drink, don’t enter a car of a man you aren’t 100% aware of, meet perspective dates or those you aren’t sure of in public, Don’t be alone where others can’t hear you, Don’t go out after dark, when someone warns you about an individual take that seriously, here’s the code you can tell your bartender to eacape an attempt, let your friends and parents know where you are and are gunna be, here’s the weapons to out in your purse, here’s the red flags to look out for…and they still are 1 in 5 and 1 in 3.