It is if you guessed wrong. The short answer is, don’t have sex with somebody unless you’re absolutely sure they would want to sober. At the end of the day you’re responsible for your own judgement and if you guess wrong, it doesn’t matter that you intended for there to be consent, you’re still responsible.
I feel like we need some kind of gradient between “rape” and what you’re describing. Some kind of protection in place for inebriated people who later, sober, regret the decision, but doesn’t immediately result in such a heavy charge.
The truth is that both sides happen. Drunk people sometimes can consent, drunkenness is a broad spectrum. And drunk people also sometimes cannot consent. Right now the more morally correct stance, in my opinion, is to go full tilt into the “drunk people can’t consent” camp and charge both parties, but there almost has to be an intermediate we could apply, no?
To be clear, I’m not a lawyer. I don’t exactly know how these cases tend to be tried. I’m basing that on a bit of a layman’s understanding.
There definitely is, it’s called not being a shitty person. If the lady you’re with is clearly hammered, or you know they’ve had more than their normal amount, you don’t try anything. Anyone with a speck of decency or morality will know the difference.
So wait, let me get this straight. Are you saying that it’s the same thing to hold down and force someone, or coerce them with threats etc, as it is to get them drunk (not maliciously, just over the course of a natural evening together)and end up sleeping together? I don’t think you necessarily are, but I just want to make sure.
Assuming we’re on the same page there, then what I’m saying is that these two cases need a -legal- difference, since they’re clearly morally different. Both can end up being damaging to the other party, but one is clearly violating someone’s rights, and the other has a lot of nuance around it.
So according to this, every time a lady and I hook up after a few drinks it’s rape? The fuck?
Get outta here you rapist!
I’ll grape you in the mouth
C’mere kids! I’m gonna tie you to the radiator and grape you in the mouth!
I’ll grape your parents
Only if you’re male.
Technically yes I guess… hmm. I wonder if there was a lady rapist who went around and raped drunk men could she get them sent to jail too?
deleted by creator
Only if you’re a misogynist.
ETA: seems I clicked on the wrong comment to respond to, I did not intend to post here.
It is if you guessed wrong. The short answer is, don’t have sex with somebody unless you’re absolutely sure they would want to sober. At the end of the day you’re responsible for your own judgement and if you guess wrong, it doesn’t matter that you intended for there to be consent, you’re still responsible.
I’m impressed you were able to type out so many words without actually saying jack shit.
I feel like we need some kind of gradient between “rape” and what you’re describing. Some kind of protection in place for inebriated people who later, sober, regret the decision, but doesn’t immediately result in such a heavy charge.
The truth is that both sides happen. Drunk people sometimes can consent, drunkenness is a broad spectrum. And drunk people also sometimes cannot consent. Right now the more morally correct stance, in my opinion, is to go full tilt into the “drunk people can’t consent” camp and charge both parties, but there almost has to be an intermediate we could apply, no?
To be clear, I’m not a lawyer. I don’t exactly know how these cases tend to be tried. I’m basing that on a bit of a layman’s understanding.
There definitely is, it’s called not being a shitty person. If the lady you’re with is clearly hammered, or you know they’ve had more than their normal amount, you don’t try anything. Anyone with a speck of decency or morality will know the difference.
So wait, let me get this straight. Are you saying that it’s the same thing to hold down and force someone, or coerce them with threats etc, as it is to get them drunk (not maliciously, just over the course of a natural evening together)and end up sleeping together? I don’t think you necessarily are, but I just want to make sure.
Assuming we’re on the same page there, then what I’m saying is that these two cases need a -legal- difference, since they’re clearly morally different. Both can end up being damaging to the other party, but one is clearly violating someone’s rights, and the other has a lot of nuance around it.