girlfriend ain’t had period since she got pregat

Someone will appreciate it.

They just haven’t arrived yet.

Dicks are so cute omg(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ when you hold one in your hand and it starts twitching its like its nuzzling you(/ω＼) or when they perk up and look at you like" owo nya? :3c" hehe ~ penis-kun is happy to see me!!（＾ワ＾） and the most adorable thing ever is when sperm-sama comes out but theyre rlly shy so u have to work hard!!(๑•̀ㅁ•́๑)✧ but when penis-kun and sperm-sama meet and theyre blushing and all like “uwaaa~!” (ﾉ´ヮ´)ﾉ*: ･ﾟhehehe~penis-kun is so adorable (●´Д｀●)・:*:・

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I’m so tired of the Apple vs Android debate.

Never amounts to anything more than a glorified dick measuring contest except somehow worse because all dicks are objectively better than greedy mega corporations.

Just pick one and let other people enjoy what they want. Most people don’t care.

Fermi or Drake, nobody cares. Just tell me and lemme get on with my life.

She a boss fr

Being a hentai actress must be so weird. Imagine this: you’re in a soundproof room pleasurably screaming into an 800,000¥ microphone about how much you love old man dick at 10:47 AM on a Tuesday in October while your 45-year-old boss oversees you through a glass window from the other room. You eventually look up after 2 hours of practicing your unnaturally high-pitched moans and see him give you a big thumbs up as you pretend to have an orgasm.

I’m a non-violent person but I think disrespecting my cat could change that.

I find it easier to inform people about the hot key.

For those unaware you just hold down Alt and press F4.