…with crypto-locked bootloaders/ECMs/tractors to make sure none of the serfs threaten the king’s power with digital pitchforks.

Assuming they keep the upstream pronunciation theory, I think it would be: fringe-n-x

Approved.

Making humongous wooden bearings?

Abducted.

I kinda want to hear more of this story… care to share the details? i.e. what was the root cause?

One could argue that they do “try to stop you”… technically… by disabling the execute bit on software update tools (like apt & deb)… but I see that more as a gentle reminder and acknowledgement of your ownership of the machine, as they could have easy just not had those tools present at all.

The ability to financially support those one would leech off of (both bandwidth & sourcing)… Nothing mandatory, but perhaps being able to post a bounty for particular hard-to-find material, or for someone to seed a dead torrent.

Meme-foul… using title as words on the image… 50-yard penalty.

Pretty much anything from protectli. Very flexible.