• theneverfox@pawb.social
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    8 days ago

    This is not debt, and I maintain my point. Debt is wrong

    If you lend out your pen and they break or lose it, a little bit of trust between you dies. And this is something inevitable over time. If you give your pen to them and they give it back once they get their own pen, trust is built. If they don’t, that’s fine too… Because you gave it to them

    You can’t count favors, and you shouldn’t have debts. Debts ruin relationships, it feels bad from both sides. It feels bad to know they owe you, it feels bad to owe a debt. It feels like a relief to have it paid back, but it doesn’t feel good

    You should help people, but when you give someone money to start their business you should never expect it back. You can spread ideas like honor and gratitude, but if the business fails you shouldn’t feel like you lost something

    If you take care of your parents because they raised you like a child, you’re asking for elder abuse. In these cultures, the parents try to chip in however they can… In hard times historically they’d wander out into the wilderness to avoid burdening the family.

    But the term for this is not debt, it’s duty. A good person is patient with their children and their parents. A good person does what they can for their family, the whole way through

    Shitty people take out their anger on their children and resent their parents for every bite of food

      • theneverfox@pawb.social
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        7 days ago

        You could frame it as debt, sure

        I’m saying this is a bad framing and you shouldn’t frame it that way, because it’s more pro social not to think of it that way

        • iii@mander.xyz
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          7 days ago

          It’s not framing. It’s a textbook example of debt.

          It’s ok to say you didn’t quite knew what the word meant. No need to try to give it a new definition, just because you didn’t know. 😄

          • theneverfox@pawb.social
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            7 days ago

            Words shape the interpretation of reality. They’re also fluid

            I know what it means. There’s a difference between a moral imperative and debt in the sense I’m trying to draw boundaries around

            You can actually just shape language because you feel like it. it doesn’t always catch on, but I’ve had pretty good results personally

    • tequinhu@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      Fair enough, I can agree on some points, and agree to disagree on others, I believe our conceptions largely align even though the labeling is different