Didn’t he know all the information on the internet? Times have changed.

Freakazoid knows everyone’s kinks.

He has the unredacted Epstein files.

He has access to everything in secure military subnets, including authentication as every general and admiral.

He knows zero-day exploits for power grids, satellites, financial systems, and air traffic control.

Freakazoid can blow up your pager.

He can spend any bitcoin on a whim.

He knows the real name and location of every spy.

He knows the psychological profile of everyone who did online therapy.

He knows what you did last summer.

Freakazoid is why Adama said “no networks”.

I’d say God help us all… but there’s a new god in town and his name is Freakazoid. He can hear us through the phone in your pocket.