Thank you for understanding. So many times when I discuss things that are adjacent to this topic, I get flamed in the comments with people accusing me of being some sort of redpiller from the manosphere.
Like, no, social isolation is a problem, and it’s getting worse due to a variety of factors. To name a few, there’s social media algorithms designed to keep people dependent on their phones; there’s the long-standing consequences of the pandemic and the collective trauma that had in addition to the atrophied social skills due to quarantine; there’s widespread political polarization which keeps tensions high and makes it difficult to navigate new situations if you can’t prove you know the right social scripts and avoid any faux pas; there’s the whole toxic influencer culture who are grifting on inflammatory rhetoric, ragebait content, exploiting people’s vulnerabilities, and radicalizing them (which is a vicious cycle, because they prey on people who are already isolated!); and that’s just to name a few!
But if I summarize all that as a “loneliness epidemic,” then people call me an incel and act like I’m trying to coerce women into having sex with me simply by acknowledging the fact that social interaction is a deeply-set human psychological need.
Like, using “incel” as an insult is part of the problem. It feeds into this culture where “if you’re a man, you must get laid, or else you’re worthless.” That’s literally promoting toxic masculinity!
And it forces these people who are already isolated and vulnerable to go identify with these groups of similarly ostracized people in echo chambers where they’re insulated from those insults, where those predatory “influencers” then have fresh pickings of new losers to neg and radicalize.
But somehow, if I point out the problem here (because how can we solve a problem if we can’t talk about it?), then to most people’s view that makes me part of the problem! Even though, why would I be calling out the pattern if it was something I identify with?
The people radicalizing these vulnerable “losers,” yes they should be torched. But the vulnerable “losers” being radicalized need to be treated with compassion if they’re ever going to be redeemed. It should be pretty easy to identify who’s who, seeing as they have an entire social structure based on hierarchies of dominance and submission…
The people radicalizing these vulnerable “losers,” yes they should be torched.
Starting with: I have found a great many of “those people” to be highly insecure, living in denial and fear that they themselves may be such a “loser” but are putting on the bully face for the world to misdirect people away from the fact that they themselves are very much the same as the people they are bullying.
This is really good. Thank you for taking the time to write it.
Thank you for understanding. So many times when I discuss things that are adjacent to this topic, I get flamed in the comments with people accusing me of being some sort of redpiller from the manosphere.
Like, no, social isolation is a problem, and it’s getting worse due to a variety of factors. To name a few, there’s social media algorithms designed to keep people dependent on their phones; there’s the long-standing consequences of the pandemic and the collective trauma that had in addition to the atrophied social skills due to quarantine; there’s widespread political polarization which keeps tensions high and makes it difficult to navigate new situations if you can’t prove you know the right social scripts and avoid any faux pas; there’s the whole toxic influencer culture who are grifting on inflammatory rhetoric, ragebait content, exploiting people’s vulnerabilities, and radicalizing them (which is a vicious cycle, because they prey on people who are already isolated!); and that’s just to name a few!
But if I summarize all that as a “loneliness epidemic,” then people call me an incel and act like I’m trying to coerce women into having sex with me simply by acknowledging the fact that social interaction is a deeply-set human psychological need.
Like, using “incel” as an insult is part of the problem. It feeds into this culture where “if you’re a man, you must get laid, or else you’re worthless.” That’s literally promoting toxic masculinity!
And it forces these people who are already isolated and vulnerable to go identify with these groups of similarly ostracized people in echo chambers where they’re insulated from those insults, where those predatory “influencers” then have fresh pickings of new losers to neg and radicalize.
But somehow, if I point out the problem here (because how can we solve a problem if we can’t talk about it?), then to most people’s view that makes me part of the problem! Even though, why would I be calling out the pattern if it was something I identify with?
The people radicalizing these vulnerable “losers,” yes they should be torched. But the vulnerable “losers” being radicalized need to be treated with compassion if they’re ever going to be redeemed. It should be pretty easy to identify who’s who, seeing as they have an entire social structure based on hierarchies of dominance and submission…
Starting with: I have found a great many of “those people” to be highly insecure, living in denial and fear that they themselves may be such a “loser” but are putting on the bully face for the world to misdirect people away from the fact that they themselves are very much the same as the people they are bullying.