I grew up with working class guys and my adult life with tech folks. I know of very few guys who want woman to dress more modestly and they are all a type of uber nerd and I think in all cases were super religious as well. Then again none of them would wear a tie without it being mandatory. Heck I barely tolerate wearing clothes in general except to protect from inclement weather.
I haven’t worn a bra in like, 9 years. If the men around me can’t handle the fact that I have nipples, then 🤷♀️
I can’t speak for anyone else, but my experience is that it is distracting. 99% of the time there will be a part of my brain that votes yes to looking at boobs. The problem is that 98% of the time it is wildly inappropriate. So now I have to deal with competing motivations in my brain. And as I have ADHD I am already fighting a constant battle to control my attention/focus. So I am not saying woman need to hide their bodies, just understand that mammals have a baked in attraction to mammary glands from birth that conflicts with social norms of not staring at someones chest constantly.
This is why I’ve always wanted my breasts removed, but have opted to significantly reduce my physical interactions with random people instead
Actually sexualization- as opposed to attraction- to breasts isn’t natural, which is wild. There are plenty of cultures where breasts aren’t sexualized, especially near the equator in some traditional cultures where women go topless.
Also as a lesbian in the US who definitely has internalized sexualizing boobs, I don’t find it at all distracting when someone isn’t wearing a bra. Maybe it is just that I see boobs in non-sexual contexts so it only is sexualized within a sexual context? That might be useful if you’re interested in unlearning this habit.
Harder to see boobs in a nonsexual context when you don’t have any, don’t live with someone who has them, or if you do they don’t pull em out nonsexually very often.
Can’t just go to the bar and say “hey can I buy you a drink? So listen I want someone to come back to my house and bring their boobs out in a nonsexual manner so I can do some exposure therapy and stop being horni cause boobage- Hey wait where are you going?!”
It isn’t that hard though. Go to a nudist retreat or beach, practice figure drawing (there are plenty of free online figure drawing resources), look at medical indexes, watch medical documentaries, just off the top of my head.
None in my area and traveling takes time and money, I can barely draw a smiley face, and medical stuff freaks me out I can’t watch those surgery shows or horror movies (I like horror, but not that kind). I prefer KOTH, True Crime, Documentaries, Planet Earth style stuff, KOTH again, Hogan’s Heroes, etc. The closest I can get to those surgery shows is MASH.
You don’t have to be good at drawing actually! The point of that sort of stuff (drawing people, still life, etc) is to develop drawing skills.
There are straight up indexes of photos of peoples breasts not presented sexually, if medical stuff squicks you out.
I’m just trying to suggest things because it seems like what you’re describing might make it harder to interact with women as people and might make women uncomfortable, and if that is something you want to fix there are avenues for doing that.
Oh I have no problem interacting with women as people, I guess I’m just kinda weird and think that sexuality (even straight people) is actually just a normal part of the human experience, and it’s normal to be attracted to people sometimes. I have it on good authority that some women get horny from looking at my hands/forearms, so I’m assuming it happens to them too even if those are different body parts than specifically boobs.
Hey I’m not trying to tell you it isn’t normal to be attracted to people, lord knows I’d be a hypocrite. It just seems like you’re describing a learned behavior associated with the sphere of attraction that might make women uncomfortable. I know one of the replies to your comments mentioned being so uncomfortable by men doing it that they thought about getting a cosmetic mastectomy.
sybau
