I asked for 120/80 blood pressure
I would wish to be forever 18, immortal, and invincible until I decide to die and I say the code word.
I won’t tell him the code word.
Revenge is a dish best served with the heat death of the universe
If you ask to be half your age, does that make the other guy 1/4th their age or at your current age?
Forever 36 is really not that bad. I’d take it over forever 18.
I would ask the genie to introduce me to someone who would be a good friend and help me improve myself, make amends, and grow.
My enemy would get two of these people, and hopefully after a while, she wouldn’t be an enemy, just a someone.
Unless your the asshole in this adversarial relationship, then they still hate you but you’ve made their life better. Which would make you not the asshole, unless you did it only because of a flawed plan. My head hurts
Everyone’s an asshole to someone.
And sometimes people hurt other people, and they hold a grudge against the people they hurt, and perhaps even hate them for it.
Shit’s unfair, humans are messy.
I try to be good to almost but not entirely everyone.
I’m not anybodys enemy. I’m the person you forget you had any interaction with. The kind of person that daily employees still don’t know my name after working there for 7+ years.
See that’s where we differ, I’m an asshole to everyone! Because I’m the CIA and that’s how we do!
That’s entirely fair, and I apologize for last night, when I took the Shit That Won’t Quit™ and your boss said you’d be docked pay if you flinched away from watching.
Not gonna lie, I was both disgusted and impressed at the same time, kinda like when you drive past a horrific car crash and can’t stop looking
My enemy would get two of these people,
And they hate each other so your enemy is forced to choose and live rest of the life wondering ‘what if?’.
Diabolical.
She doesn’t have enough introspection to form a concept like “what if,” she’s still hung up on “why am I, the main character, experiencing any bad things at all.”
Wish to have an eight inch penis. Eight is already quite large. Sixteen is a disability.
He gets 2 loose penises, you get one. The police becomes suspicious.
Wish for “blowjobs from my enemy’s mother”
Congrats, you win no matter what.
Beat me half to death
Scare me half to death sounds a bit more pleasant.
Hahahaha
I’d ask for a healthy brain that keeps me mentally sharp until I die.
My enemy will get 2 brains, squishing each other in his head and killing him instantly.Well, no, you had a brain, now you got a second. But your enemy has three, I suppose.
I’d still ask for an unreasonable amount of money.
Too much money ruins your life. Wish yourself enough, and your enemy will be bankrupt or ruinously insane inside of a decade.
This is a lie people like to tell themselves.
Posting from a Marxist instance about how great being rich is. That’s pretty great, actually.
Being rich in a capitalist society is pretty great. What sucks about capitalism is that everyone can’t share in how kicksss being rich is, because all the kickass parts of being rich require a fuckton of people to be poor & suffering while you wring the benefits from them.
☝️This guy gets it.
Get unlimited money and that killer snail that chases you. Same benefit, twice the problems.
Your enemy has just exploded. Well played.
buy one of my cajones for $10m
Hell I’ll take $20mil for both and buy my testosterone.
