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The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to Humor@lemmy.worldEnglish · 4 个月前

Ready for Friday night

lemmy.world

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Ready for Friday night

lemmy.world

The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to Humor@lemmy.worldEnglish · 4 个月前
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  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    4 个月前

    PACE YOURSELF! 5 beers/hour

    Open bottle of tequila

    You’re not following the instructions!

    • peregrin5@piefed.social
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      4 个月前

      you have to pregame at least enough to be able to talk to the girls and not just hide in a corner

      • SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world
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        4 个月前

        My talking to girls level is two drinks past pushing rope territory.

        • Alaik@lemmy.zip
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          4 个月前

          Damn man, that blows.

        • Sc00ter@lemmy.zip
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          4 个月前

          Thats unfortunate for you. Im sorry to hear that

    • NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world
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      4 个月前

      Tequila isn’t a beer, there were no rules stated about tequila, thus there are no rules against drinking tequila, it’s fair game.

    • Kanda@reddthat.com
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      4 个月前

      It doesn’t limit tequilas/hr

    • Maalus@lemmy.world
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      4 个月前

      “Name: Michael” in case he isn’t following instructions.

  • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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    4 个月前

    Holy shit, are we still on Grey’s Anatomy?

    • bobs_monkey@lemmy.zip
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      4 个月前

      Is that show still going?

      • Kindness is Punk@lemmy.ca
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        4 个月前

        it sure is! I proxy watch it by being in the same room as my wife!

        • bobs_monkey@lemmy.zip
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          4 个月前

          Damn, that’s some longevity. Are any of the original cast still around?

          • trashcan@sh.itjust.works
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            4 个月前

            Looks like these three have held on.

            imdb screenshot showing Ellen Pompeo,
Chandra Wilson, and James Pickens Jr. have been in 448 episodes from 2005–present

            Can’t really blame them.

            • bobs_monkey@lemmy.zip
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              4 个月前

              Hell yeah, that’s some job security lol

              • trashcan@sh.itjust.works
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                4 个月前

                Plus for Pompeo, being the titular character means job security for a lot more than just her.

                @[email protected] does it seem like her heart is still in it?

                • Kindness is Punk@lemmy.ca
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                  4 个月前

                  Honestly yes but it seems like it might be one of those things where the cast is just fun to work with so everyone’s having a good time.

                • A Wild Mimic appears!@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                  4 个月前

                  Wasn’t the title originally the book her mother wrote?

            • Fredselfish@lemmy.world
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              4 个月前

              Holy shit I haven’t watched that show since 2012. Crazy still on the air.

        • whoisearth@lemmy.ca
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          4 个月前

          Oh man this is years ago but my ex used to watch it (may still no idea) and when that plotline with Katherine hegl and her ghost husband was happening I remember lifting my head from my laptop and going “wait what?!” And then laughing my ass off.

          • QuoVadisHomines@sh.itjust.works
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            4 个月前

            Then you might have missed the show’s most unhinged moment where a gun hidden in a woman’s vaginal cavity goes off and shoots a patient.

            • whoisearth@lemmy.ca
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              You are not fucking serious.

              What kind of gun? Lol

              • QuoVadisHomines@sh.itjust.works
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                4 个月前

                100% serious, gungina happens in s18 I think? it’s a pistol.

    • invertedspear@lemmy.zip
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      This has got to be at least a few years out of date. Kanye is on the avoid list, and he’s not really relevant lately. And that income in the finance field isn’t going to impress gold diggers. FNAF is a bit dated at this point too, isn’t it?

      • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        I kind of love that Kanye had that breakdown where he released the Heil Hitler track and went to twitter posting all caps shit saying he was a nazi, and the internet’s collective reaction seems to have just kind of rolled their eyes and move on. Just pure apathy. It’s not shocking or contreversial, more “Yeah, we all figured that out ages ago. Fuck off.”

      • taiyang@lemmy.world
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        4 个月前

        My college aged students are still pretty big on FNAF so probably not dated. Ye would be a terrible conversation starter by today’s standards, though, even more so than whenever this was made, lol. “So, how to you feel about Nazi sympathisers?”

      • LiveLM@lemmy.zip
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        4 个月前

        A new FNAF game released just a couple days ago, can you believe it?

      • QuoVadisHomines@sh.itjust.works
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        FNAF has a new game and a collab with Dead by Daylight

  • Im_old@lemmy.world
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    Hum, 75-100k for a finance something isn’t a lot I think. I mean, I know this is a joke but that sounds wrong.

    On a side note, I’d love to talk about with him about all the points under “topic to avoid”!

    • Album@lemmy.ca
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      Depends on what in “finance” and where. Assuming not sales or trading the salaries come down quite a bit depending on job level.

      • NJSpradlin@lemmy.world
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        deleted by creator

      • Drathro@sh.itjust.works
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        4 个月前

        AND the workload goes up! The Financial Services industry sure is fun!

      • bobs_monkey@lemmy.zip
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        4 个月前

        That’s why it’s finance something

    • whoisearth@lemmy.ca
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      4 个月前

      I see you also like to poke the bear lol. Seriously with me no topic is off limit I’ll challenge every opinion someone has doesn’t mean I disagree with it.

      Also Boston Celtics are no? Because Boston is racist AF?

      • Im_old@lemmy.world
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        Arguing for the sole purpose of arguing. Are you an engineer by any chance 😅

        I don’t even know what kind of sport the Celtics are a team of. Doesn’t mean I could not at least listen.

        • whoisearth@lemmy.ca
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          Nope just the ADD.

          Celtics are basketball and my first love of a team before Toronto got The Raptors. That said their fambase is kinda toxic.

  • Gork@sopuli.xyz
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    I too sometimes forget my own name and work in something field.

    • jonathan7luke@lemmy.zip
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      4 个月前

      https://youtu.be/XLcswkROgx8

    • ameancow@lemmy.world
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      All fields can be “finance” depending on how you look at it.

    • burgerpocalyse@lemmy.world
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      https://youtu.be/fXpVEwEhamw

  • ExploitedAmerican@lemmy.world
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    If you’ve heard about the “pip boy” you’re gonna love the new Incel-erator 5000

    • RagnarokOnline@programming.dev
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      I believe it’s a playbook that NFL quarterbacks wear, but I like the Pipboy idea way better

  • 鳳凰院 凶真 (Hououin Kyouma)@sh.itjust.works
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    deleted by creator

    • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      Imagine dating a conservative. Ew.

      • sandwich.make(bathing_in_bismuth)@sh.itjust.works
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        Imagine dating and politics being such a polarizing dealbreaker you miss out on potential partners and good company

        • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          Not hard to imagine at all when we are talking about literal fascist supporters.

          • sandwich.make(bathing_in_bismuth)@sh.itjust.works
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            If I lived in the US I might agree. Never met one.

            • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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              Lucky you lol

              • sandwich.make(bathing_in_bismuth)@sh.itjust.works
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                Its difficult cause conservative in your country is much different then here in most European countries. Normally I’d kneejerk about auto conservative hate but our conservative is like left-middle democrat.

    • potoooooooo ☑️@lemmy.world
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      YES:

      • You’re basically a centrist!
      • Both sides make some really good points.
      • Possible ice-breaker: “Have you noticed how nobody wants to work anymore?”
      • Possible ice-breaker: “Have you noticed we can’t joke about anything anymore?”
    • gmtom@lemmy.world
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      Could also be a radical leftist, i know from the experience tslking about the opressive nsture of capitalism and how were brainwashed by the media into a consumerist lifestyle isnt something most baddies cinsider good first date talk.

      • Deathray5@lemmynsfw.com
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        I’d marry but I’m a bit weird (Lemmy user and all)

      • Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de
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        if they don’t leap over the table to start sucking on your face when you talk about anarchism then they aren’t the one

  • bluesheep@sh.itjust.works
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    4 个月前

    pace yourself - 5 beers/hour

    Man’s going into the date at marathon pace

    • general_kitten@sopuli.xyz
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      4 个月前

      but unlimited tequila judging by the picture

      • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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        4 个月前

        With only 5 beers per hour, he’s obviously going to be thirsty.

  • Taleya@aussie.zone
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    Bud, fuck that come get shitfaced with me and nerd about about the Titanic

    • ameancow@lemmy.world
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      4 个月前

      I couldn’t possibly spend a moment with a woman who couldn’t talk with me about historical disasters.

      I held to my values and wanted good things for myself and that’s what I got.

      • Taleya@aussie.zone
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        Ayup. Autistic abrasive af here, never made any attempt to change or hide who i am. Been happily married 20 years

        • ameancow@lemmy.world
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          Major congratulations. I despair seeing so many people who ostensibly want the same things and yet live in constant stress for living up to some imagined image of what’s “normal” or “proper” for a relationship.

          People tend to argue for why they’re lonely so impassionately that you start to realize that loneliness and hopelessness is what they actually want on some level because it’s more comfortable than the challenges of sharing your actual life with someone, and their brains are just inventing stories for why they can’t find a partner who they can be friends with and enjoy things together.

          We have entire industries of scammers on social media pushing videos that serve only to feed this insecurity and avoidance and it’s making everything so much worse. I’m very glad I’m not part of the modern dating world because I’ve known what I’ve wanted since the beginning.

          • Taleya@aussie.zone
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            I know so many people who are in unhappy relationships because they’re following a scrupt.

            I also know a great many who have wiped their arse with it.

            Best thing you can be is yourself, ya got no other fucking choice anyway

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
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      Something something Rockerfeller

      • Taleya@aussie.zone
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        Every time we launch a titanic a buncha rich cunts die.

        We need a fleet

  • theUwUhugger@lemmy.world
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    Thats why you go for femboys! He is a bro with a hole!!!

    • ☂️-@lemmy.ml
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      .

      • theUwUhugger@lemmy.world
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        I guess? But I am personally not gay

        • socsa@piefed.social
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          Not with that attitude

        • BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world
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          just focus on the fem aspects then youll be fine 👍

      • theUwUhugger@lemmy.world
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        deleted by creator

  • Dr_Box@lemmy.world
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    4 个月前

    Checks notes

  • emeralddawn45@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    I assumed this was a cheat sheet with the dating profile of someone they were meeting from online dating, but judging by the comments i misinterpreted. Why would someone need a cheat shret with their own name and not know what their own job is?

    • Ephera@lemmy.ml
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      My interpretation is that they’re bad at smalltalk and will forget basic facts about themselves. It would fit in with them needing a list of smalltalk topics to choose/avoid…

    • Obi@sopuli.xyz
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      Because it’s their catfish identity I guess.

    • Empricorn@feddit.nl
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      • “Finance something”
      • variable income

      I know it’s a joke, but he’s lying to get laid.

    • Deathray5@lemmynsfw.com
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      5 beers a day

  • Lovable Sidekick@lemmy.world
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    Yeah… those old hippies with their “be yourself” and “let it all hang out” - clearly the key to life is to wear a mask. Such enlighten. So fulfillment.

    • nexguy@lemmy.world
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      You can be yourself without a deluge of your own interests flooding the conversation. Unless being yourself of taking only about yourself and no listening. In that case mask on.

  • Wilco@lemmy.zip
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    This made me Google Coleen Hoover to find out what she does and I still dont know what she does. Something to do with flowery pastel book covers.

  • Emerald (she/her)@lemmy.world
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    No politics unless feminist?

    • mholiv@lemmy.world
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      It’s a good rule for life. :)

  • Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works
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    Are people touchy about Tornadoes?

    • Madison420@lemmy.world
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      Probably over overly enthusiastic which can be a bad thing in the Midwest during tornado season.

      • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world
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        Midwest here.

        a tornado once broke into my house and raped my cat. this is why when I see one of those sumbitches I shoot at it.

        the only good tornado is a dead tornado.

        • Madison420@lemmy.world
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          I mean like storm chasers.

          • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world
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            like riders on the storm?

    • MNByChoice@midwest.social
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      Not the “getting laid” vibe.

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